its my life story

be mature.

23 January 2009 @ 3:46 PM

it dosent went wrong anywhere i suppose. & now,let me express my feelings
that ive been keeping for months i suppose too. all this happened definitely has its own
reasons. im not e type whom actually hate ppl for no reasons. especially for the one
whom had actually been by my side all dis while. & also not a hypocrite for sure.
& i shall said this again,im just expressing my feelings alright? LOL! hmm. giving in.
dosent it sounds familiar somewhere? hah. if i cud actually ask anyone right now,
i wna ask,for all this pathetic while,who is e one whom actually contacted whom now?
either by sms,msn,phone call or even,who actually plan a day out with everyone for
our last meeting. e one when we went to town especially? dont tell me its not me. hah.
im e one whom actually trying to catching up things with almost everyone. but there
u said ur the one whom actually finding us? this is hilarious isint it? haha. ppl definitely
do made mistake. but do dey know wad mistake they've done totally? i wldnt acted cold
to anyone whom i know unless that particular person does something wrong with me.
i know. its my fault for not saying it out. but i wna see. for how long will u realise
ur mistake? the only mistake that u have not yet realise? im trying to be mature here. but by saying this things out in the public is totally not mature laa. how can dis called mature
when u wnt this to be solved maturely? & infact u guys will surely said this is childish.
please laa. wads e meaning of mature? it means,fully grown. do u ppl agree by saying all
dis things out in public means mature? why not give it a call or even face it in
a face to face manner? this is called mature? bullshit laa eh. hah. & if this all started with
the two of us,please. it dosent. it started with u too along the way. dont u think i dont
know. the one whom had a conflict with me said tat u even talked bad abt me to her.
& to me u talked bad abt her. whats this? so now,ur saying im in wrong? your saying it
all started with both of us? please,ur "berbelah bagi" attitude is so not siperlukan. &
tat last meeting day. tat sindiran is really for u. knape terase? well,tak pernahkan
aku sindir org gitu kan? ive been really patient. but well,its already up to the
limit. its not we're being jealous because of u poly life or wadsoever. BUT,
did u ever realise tat each time we met,u will for sure said about ur poly life,
FOR SURE. then how abt ur bestfriend? whom u have know for years. since young?
dint u tink she take it to heart? she does for sure. she even complinted. did u
ever knew abt it? NEVER. wad u know,once meet up,for sure polylife stories
will be e highlights for the day. its fair for us right? Oh well. even when we went
out together,the oth two whom is also in poly,dint even said abt their poly life.
well,they did said but not much. cause,they know,when they're with us,it means
no poly life will be touch. do u ever see that as a point? NOOO! u dint. so now,its
our fault? we did realise our mistake. i did too. my mistake is to trust the wrong
person. ive trusted two wrong person at the same go. & at the end,both betrayed
me. & e great thing,both had e same technique. how great! haha. & i wna say this
too. not to ungkit or wad. but i think its e fact. when u need someone to talk to
2 or 3 am in the morning,whom did u called to? cried with? ive nvr ever think
ive done deeds to ppl. but when aku termakan budi dgn org,sume ungkit balik.
so,i shud deserve all this for all this while laa eh? & when u had prob with the
guy u liked for years,we helped u sincerely. kite tak mintak budi baik dibalas laa.
pleasee. when ur happy,we're happy for u. & when u asked me to said smth to one
of us abt her bf and stuff,who actually get into trouble? its me! NOT YOU! did u ever
said to that person tat actually you're the one whom asked me to said it to her?
did u? i dint even said to her tat u do. but u? did u realise it? & yes,please mind ur
mouth too. if u know tat ur the type sng sakit hati bile kene hine or sindir or wad,
please,think back. did we ever said very bad negative to u? but u did. u said im fat
indirectly. im sure u've forgotten it all. but it still fresh in my mind. i wldnt have
forgotten it. hah. but i dont mind. i dint even said back. i just kept quite or even,
i just laugh it out loud. but,did u ever think abt the oth feelings? e last outing,btw
e 6 of us. u said to e one whom dint tag along with us that u feel akward when ur
with me right? whereesle,aku lyn dgn baik. like normally i did. knape mesti putar
belitkan crite? asal? takde crite lain nak reke ke? just an advise from me to you,
if ur not sincere in helping me out with my prob,please,dont ever bother to help
at first place. when ur having prob,im not reluctant to help. even im sincere. i
dint even ungkit balik or wad. but now uve ungkit balik,then,i will. u force me to.
reflect this back laa eh. im not tryignt o prolong this things. infact,ive almost forgotten
all those unprecious memories with me but here,u ungkit it back. so,wad to do,ive got
to ungkit balik lorr. fair & squre kan? so long for u then.

&& yes,before i forgotten too,to e person whom ive already had gone through with.
i though btw the both of us are though already? no more conflicts and stuff? but why
i still get some comments from u? psl time Olevel result tu. u said wheres my true friends?
why they're to beside me when im down & stuff infact shes happy for her result.
but wait,i dint expect anyone to be by my side at that point of time though. secare
kebetulan maybe? idk. & if ur touching abt my true friends,u expect her to be sad for
me 24hours? no right? she did well,so she ought to be happy. so,i dint see tat as a
negative thing. so now,ur saying tat all this while ur a goodfriend? please,aku bkn nk
ungkit lagi eh skg. but,i wna ask u. when ur down last time. breakdown in school and
stuff,who is by your side all along? ur oth close friends? or u can said ur best pals or
wadsoever? when ur having prob with ur bf,ur mom or whomever with,u cried,u need
someone by your side,whos by your side? im not going to say who laa. but u shud noe it
yourself. did your oth friends is there by your side? did they? aku sebole2 taknk ungkit
pasl tu sume. but u force me too. den i also heard from one of the sec 5 girl tat u said to
one of her friend abt our prob i guess? & wad comment i get from tat girl was,
"oh shahida tu? she dont have friends kan? shes the one yg rampas kwn (your name)"
idk if this was for true. but if this is true,aku nk tanye,kwn kau yg mane aku nk rampas huh?
when we're not close anymore,im close with the 4Es. dont tell me i snatch them from u.
haha. bullshit. i guess,im done here. its a reallyreally long post i guess. i hope mature
ppl will tink maturely abt this prob. its up to all of u to decide whho is right & who is in
wrong. u guys got brain to think right? lol. & so,i gna private back my blog till sunday. or
maybe longer? depends on my mood. hah. if anyone cud publish thier prob publicly,so
do i. am i right? hah. okay,im done for now.

so long ppl.
takecare.
:)

Labels: im done.